I work full-time, Monday through Friday, at Ducommun LaBargeTechnologies. I must be at work by 7:45 a.m. and I do not get off work until 4:30 p.m. The people I work with are like my second family, but the only difference between my work family and my actual family is that I cannot address problems that I may have with my work family. I feel telling my work family what I actually think may be inappropriate at work so I just choose to keep my mouth shut. Sometimes the people I work with drive me crazy! I must say for the past two weeks one person, in particular, has almost driven me over the edge.
First of all, this situation began about two weeks ago and involved a woman who I had been friends, or so I thought, for a while. I have bent over backwards for her at work and within her personal life to try to ease her stress level and help her through various situations. One crucial situation that my husband and I helped all that we could was when she experienced severe roof damage in the May tornado. Her boyfriend, she, and her four kids were in the basement of their house when the tornado came through. As soon as I heard about the tornado on the radio, I headed to her house to make sure she and her family was alright. Monday, after the tornado, my husband and I decided we were going to go to her damaged house to help her salvage her things and help her move them to her parent’s house. The way she acted during this whole traumatic event was shocking. Instead of wanting to save her personal things, she told my husband and me to just leave the stuff because insurance would just pay for new stuff. I could not believe it! I mean why would a person not want to save as many personal or sentimental items as they could? Also, she kept ordering my husband and me to go to the store to buy her things such as cigarettes, fountain drinks, and other miscellaneous items. I did not care to buy her some things but we could not pay for everything. I mean, it is hard enough to provide for my own family, let alone another family. I was literally appalled at how much she was taking advantage of the help she received.
Next, I feel that if this woman does not have enough drama in her life, then she will create drama to keep her occupied. At work, for instance, all she does is gripe about the pettiest things. I got so tired of hearing about these events that I began avoiding her around the workplace. We also would go to lunch every day together, but now we have stopped doing that because most of the time I would either end of paying for all or at least half of her lunch daily. Obviously, I just cannot afford to do that. So, within the past two weeks I have just stopped talking to her and stopped having anything to do with her, unless it is work-related. I guess she realized that I did not want to speak to her and now she has turned it all around on me.
Moreover, today just took the cake. I guess the truth is that is bothers me very much that she acts like she does not even care if I am upset or anything. Maybe, she was never my true friend. Today, when we were both on break, she was approximately 5 feet from me and would not even look at me nor would she speak to me at all. We were the only two people outside and I felt very awkward. I tried to start a conversation, thinking I would be the bigger person, but she would not respond to me with anything other than one-word answers. This situation did not resolve anything, it only made it worse. She also sent me emails that were work-related but was very disrespectful and expressed feelings of anger towards me. I just cannot stand it!
However, I work with two other wonderful girls and they always have my back. I will also always have their backs because we can get along and do things for each other without bringing drama into the situation. Since one of these girls noticed that I was having a horrible day, she went to Starbucks and surprised me with my absolute favorite drink – Caramel Frappuccino! This is what makes working with a horrible person so much better because I know I have true friends that actually care about me as a person, co-worker, and friend. I would not be able to continue working around this woman if it were not for these two awesome ladies. I am so thankful I have other friends who enjoy my company and I theirs! What would I do without these two wonderful friends?
I truly hope that things at work will get better for you. I know that it's hard when things like this happen especially at work where we spend so much of our lives. I'll tell you what my boss told me in a similar situation - just keep doing your best and do your best to ignore those who are causing the drama because they are looking for the reaction - eventually the person causing the drama will move on because they no longer get the reaction they are looking for. I know it sounds like a novel idea, but I have also come to realize that the sooner you can do this, the better off you will be. It will make it much easier to go to work and to enjoy work again. I wish you all the luck in getting past this situation and applaud you for being gracious for those around you who are genuine and positive - these are the people who will always have your back too.
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